


Perceived Obsolescence

by skittenninja



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Anxiety Attacks, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Insecure Logic | Logan Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders Needs a Hug, Logic | Logan Sanders-centric, Loneliness, Sad Logic | Logan Sanders, everyone else means well but logic needs some emotional support too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-01
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:15:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23958268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skittenninja/pseuds/skittenninja
Summary: Sure, there'd been conversation after conversation without Logan. Sure, the others started to talk over him more frequently, ignoring his contributions. And sure, they didn't even notice when he wasn't there.But that didn't mean anything. It wasn't like it bothered him.Emotions weren't his job.
Comments: 16
Kudos: 149





	Perceived Obsolescence

Logan was fine with this.

That’s what he assured himself again and again, anyways.

It started off with just one discussion. Just one that he wasn’t a part of. This was fine. It had happened before, and he hadn’t felt this way about it. It would surely happen again in the future, since he couldn’t possibly be involved in every single conversation that they all had. It was to be expected.

There was no oversight on anyone’s part, and the way he was feeling was completely temporary. After all, he wasn’t one to sulk. He didn’t get emotional. That wasn’t his job, and Logan wasn’t about to claim it.

He’d wait it out, and things would go back to normal. After all, ‘normal’ is what is expected, and he was excellent at predicting and analyzing that.

Things didn’t go quite back to normal, though. Another discussion happened. A huge one. Logan was pretty sure some kind of fight had happened, but he wasn’t sure.

It seemed personal, and obviously he didn’t want to interfere with that. There was no point in meddling in something that wasn’t his area of expertise, right?

They all knew that. It’s why they didn’t call on him for advice.

One thing led to another and a different conversation came up later. The fight from last time seemed to be resolved. Logan still had no idea what it was about. That was fine. If they didn’t want him to know, he wouldn’t pry. Emotions weren’t his forte.

Straightening his tie, Logan entered the conversation, happy to be able to contribute to something that he was more familiar with.

But, every time he opened his mouth, it seemed like someone else had something more important to say. His words were drowned out in the cacophony of conflicting opinions, and Logan wasn’t able to get a word in edgewise.

All that was left at the end was a joke about how unusually quiet he’d been.

It was lighthearted. Logan knew that. He understood their jokes and sarcasm better than he used to. It was supposed to be funny.

Logan wasn’t laughing, though.

He went to point out that no one had let him speak, but he was only met with silence. Everyone else had already left.

He’d been unable to say anything, and the only thing he’d been able to converse with was the quiet.

This was still fine, however. People get distracted sometimes. Everyone else had valuable stuff to contribute, and he wasn’t going to shame them for doing so. He’d just have to speak up a little next time.

Logan ended up waiting quite a while for ‘next time.’ A couple of shorter conversations happened without him knowing. When he asked about what he had missed later on, everyone remarked that they hadn’t even noticed he’d been absent.

It seemed his skills weren’t needed that time, or the time after.

It seemed they weren’t needed very much at all these days.

Logan finally caught another discussion as it was happening and quickly joined the group. He knew he had information to contribute, analyses to make.

But, just like last time, his points were swept away in the storm of a spirited conversation, every sentence that someone else spoke like another gust of snowy wind that put an icy wall between him and everyone else.

His contributions weren’t needed.

_He_ wasn’t needed.

In fact, it felt like they rarely had a use for him at all anymore. Logan was just a prop to throw jokes at, a name behind logic.

Why would they care about how he felt?

Logan left without a word, thinking about how ridiculous he was being. How he _felt_? He didn’t have the time nor the need for that. He needed to focus on how Thomas was doing. How the other sides were doing. It wasn’t his responsibility to contribute his _feelings_ , nor were the others obligated to hear about them. All he had to do was serve as a voice of reason. Provide a logical perspective to keep things running smoothly.

But it seemed like things had been running smoothly recently without a logical perspective.

Without him.

They really didn’t need him anymore.

Tears were falling down Logan’s cheeks, but he didn’t register them at first. He was too busy thinking about how they probably didn’t even want him anymore. They didn’t want to hear anything he had to say. And maybe they’d understood his prior necessity before, but Logan was caught up in the realization that maybe they didn’t enjoy his company.

_Ask the robot for fact after fact until you get bored with what is has to say,_ Logan thought. _Until you get annoyed._

He’d managed to get to his room, though he didn’t quite remember how. It didn’t really matter. No one would notice. No one would care where he was.

Logan recognized what he was feeling. He didn’t want to deal with it. He didn’t know how to.

He wasn’t _supposed_ to be feeling like this. There weren’t supposed to be tears streaming down his face and his chest wasn’t supposed to feel so unbearably tight as he tried to steady his breathing, hands feeling disconnected from the rest of his body as he retreated further and further into the back of his own thoughts. Logan knew what was happening and he was unable to stop it.

And there was no one there to help him.

Maybe this was why they didn’t need him anymore. This wasn’t supposed to happen to him. He was the one who was supposed to help in these situations, ground everything back to reality.

Now all he could do was feel himself becoming detached from it all in such a terrifying manner.

How was he supposed to help everyone else when he was too busy drowning?

Emotions weren’t his job, and with a strangled sob, Logan felt like logic wasn’t his job either.

He had nothing.

He wasn’t wanted or needed.

And he hated himself for it.


End file.
